That's seriously what Star looks like at night. No joke and absolutely no editing done there. Just imagine yourself in your room all alone at night with Star lurking in the shadows somewhere, and with absolutely NO escape...like me. Kidding sort of ;-) Your childhood fears of the dark have come back to haunt you. LOL.
Tadpole on March 4th, 2004. Last week somebody asked what color he was; he was a Seal Colorpoint--one of my favorite colors and patterns. Seal is the color, and Colorpoint is the pattern. :-)
I have no idea what I was saying on Sunday about quitting my blog. I need to stop being such a people-pleaser and being so ungrateful. 1-6 comments a day is better than none, and page reviews are more important to me, but above all my happiness is. Never give up! :-)
For those of you that said euthanizing Nico was painful--think again. In fact, it was the easiest decision I've ever made. Yes, I know that may sound wrong, but to me its not. Think about it, the pros of euthanizing outweigh the pros of having a few selfish hours with him alive until he dies. Nico had HCM which thickens the walls of his heart until they're damaged then it leads to heart failure. He also had liver failure. I admire his bravery more than mine. I repaid those few selfish hours I never spent with him for staying by his side as he was dying. I wouldn't have traded it for the world, and I wouldn't let anything stand in my way of being beside my dying baby. Plus who the fuck wants to die alone? Yes, we all die in the end, but Nico deserved freedom from pain and suffering, and if I was to die, I'd want him by my side too, but I'd die alone if he wanted me too too. He gave me more than what I gave him, but at least I gave him what he really wanted--freedom.
And I gave him his freedom 2 weeks ago. Yeah, he's been dead 2 weeks.
And in dying we are born to eternal life. Is what it says above his picture.
Blogging, what a joy. I've loved it for 1 year. But....maybe I'm not cut out for my work. I have no problem getting page reviews, but I lack comments; and by a lot. I've tried basically everything under the sun; Pinterest, Google+, Instagram, leaving my blog link around, leaving comments, following new people, etc. And I have 3 words for that: Shit. Ain't. Workin'. I'm not sure if its the way I write, or what, but I finally give up. I'm sad to say I'm leaving, but maybe I'll turn around someday. Leave your invisible comments--I'll be keeping this blog to myself for sometime.
Anya is bigger than Saphira, because she is a Ragdoll. But Saphira, says: "I maybe smaller but I'll knock that bitch the fuck out!". Anya: "Bitch please." Saphira: "You're the fat ass that weighs 13lbs!"
Anya: "Shut your fucking month, Saphira!"
And that's the tail (tale) of the two bitches on Saturday night.... ;-)
As most of you know by now Nico&Anya were purchased in 2012 at the age of 3 years and 11 months old. 2 years and 11 months later, Nico gets sick, gets HCM, heart failure, liver failure, and dies. On Wednesday July 16th 2014, I contacted his former owner, his breeder, and his parents's breeder. I never did get a reply from his breeder. However, I did hear from his former owner and his parents's breeder. His parents's breeder ( from Bailey's Ragdolls) claims that its not her fault Nico is dead from HCM; she tried to blame it on me, then realizing that I'm the second owner (or should I say was the second owner) then she goes to blame it on his first owner, then I tell her it wasn't her fault sense she wasn't the breeder of Nico. Finally; and with no one else to blame, she decides to blame it on Nico's breeder, but what what she is unaware of is that its actually her fault; not mine, not his old owner, not his breeder, but herself! ( it was her very responsible act to test for HCM BEFORE selling another breeder one or two positive cats with HCM). She did this to us:
And nope, he isn't dead. He isn't sleeping. He's dying. (And yes, he peed on my bed, he couldn't help it, he couldn't move from that position.) This is Nico on the same day (July 14th Monday, 2014) before he had to be put down. This is him less than an hour before he went to the vet. He was barely hanging on, I had to use my own oxygen to keep him alive as his poor lungs couldn't keep up with his failing heart. He had to crawl with all his might to get to my face to scream at me to get up from sleeping in bed, from the foot of the bed, he had to crawl with his front legs and clawless paws to reach me; his back legs failed on him, they wouldn't work--he had became paralyzed likely due to a blood clot in one of his vaines in his hid legs. She didn't raise him, she didn't love him, she wasn't there to watch him struggle to move a foot without gasping for air, she wasn't there to spend well over $1,000 dollars to try and save his life, she wasn't there when I did CPR on him, she wasn't there when the vets told us he had to be euthanized, she wasn't there to hold his paw and pet him as the vets put him out of his misery, she doesn't have the last memories of him struggling to breath like I do or the very freshest memories of me holding his lifeless body in the vet's office. All this and all I asked for was two words--I'm. Sorry. But no, I received this:
She's an abusive fucking bitch, and there's no way else to put it. How can you treat someone like that? Especially when they lost their beloved 5 year old cat to HCM! And where she refereed to the "female cat" she was talking about Nico&Anya's mother; which clearly states on their papers that Queen Alexandria (their mother) was her cat, either someone made a massive mistake or she's lying to me again. And she misspelt Nico's breeder's name; its Cheryl, not Sheryl.
In the end I paid the price. I told her I was sorry for treating her like shit, when she started it and just should of said I'm sorry. You would of already probably guessed by now, but I will NEVER own another cat with her HCM lines in it again, and sure as shit I'll never buy a cat from her.
My beautiful, smart, funny, kind hearted boy,Thank you to the bottom of my heart for giving me 2 wonderful years with you and your sister Anya. You could make me smile any day! You were so fun to play with, I loved playing fetch with you, and bouncing your little foam softball on the floor so you could hit it and it'd roll under my room door, I miss opening my room door and having you run out to greet our family in the living room and kitchen, I miss your non-stop meowing, I miss your cute little pink nose nuzzling under my hands while I write posts for my blogs, I miss your cute little face less than 3 inches from my face at night and when I wake up in the morning, I miss seeing you make little "man caves" in my bed pillows and blankets, I miss kissing your cute little face, nose, and head at night before I go to sleep, I miss getting complemented with you when we go places, I miss throwing your football toy down the hall way and having you race down it to grap it and bring it back to me--though sometimes it was vice versa lol, I miss kissing your beautiful long luxurious tail, I miss seeing you and Anya snuggling together at night or day, I miss traveling with you, I miss feeding 4 cats, I miss the sound of your ID tag and bell on your collar jingle whenever you moved, I miss your "night-time crazies" and seeing you run around like a chicken with it's head cut off and then seeing you run and jump onto my bed,but most of all....
I simply cannot thank each and everyone of you enough for all of the support and beautiful comments and emails after I lost my beloved Nico to the heartbreaking HCM on Monday. This has gone from heartache and shocking ness to almost bare able, the love and support from all of you was just what our family needed, I tried my hardest to go to each one of your blogs and say thanks, but I think I forgot some, so thank you anyways for your kindness. Nico was loved by many and hated by none, he will be deeply missed by the thousands of hearts he touched both by over the internet and in person, or should I say cat. From now on whatever Monday on my blog use to be (reviews, modern Monday, etc) will now be Nico Monday, like Tadpole Tuesday, but only Monday and for Nico. :-)
The wonderful people at Zoolatry, made this beautiful and thoughtful badge for my Angel Smuggles (Nico).
For those of you that are wondering, Mr. Puffy Duffy Fluffy Nickers (what I affectionately called him, but aka Nico) had to be euthanized yesterday afternoon. He had gotten very ill on Sunday morning,( I'm not sure if he knew what was happening to him, and I don't what to know). his face was heavily swollen, his normal pink colored paw pads and nose had turned to gray, he vomited once, and he was in a lot of pain, so we rushed him to the vet as soon as possible. They did blood work on him and put him on oxygen and injected him with fluids and steroids. They sent him home with us with special food for him and antibotics for him. That day I didn't even bother to eat or drink anything, I sat down by Nico's side day and night; I ate 2 things that day, dinner and a snack, that was all. I had told him that he would get better tomorrow, but I regret saying that...
Monday morning was the saddest day of my life. Nico had many "seizures" that day, and he flipped off my bed and knocked the breath out of him, so I did feline CPR, thankfully that worked and I got him breathing again, but about fainted myself after words. He had another one when he went in the car (and no he wasn't in a crate) he was laying on my lap in the passenger's seat, and when he had that seizure, he about flipped under the driver's seat, but I caught him mid-air before that happened. When we arrived at the vet, I speed-walked in with Nico, and shortly after I gave him to the vet, he stopped breathing, his heart was still beating, so they put him on oxygen again, but they told me that he now couldn't live without the use of the vet's oxygen, so they gave me 2 options: take him home and have him die at home but be in terrible pain until he dies, or have him be euthanized. I knew what my choice was long before they gave me my options. I choose euthanizing for a number of reasons, but I think Nico wanted his pain to go away, so I spoke for him, I like to think that he appreciated my choice for him, I'm glad I got to see him in his last moments of life. While it was painful for me to watch him be put down, I think it helped him stay calm while I was with him, holding his paw and petting him while they did what was needed. They told me that it would be shocking to see him hooked up to oxygen and while they were euthanizing him, but really I thought watching him living in misery and pain was more shocking. The kindest act of love I ever did for him was probably ask to have his life ended that day. The only thing I regret (besides him dying) was to ask them if I could hold him while he was being put down. But I'm glad I got a few minutes of peace and quite by myself and him after he had been euthanized, and I swear I saw him blink at me once and try to nuzzle under my chin as I held him close to my chest.
My mom petting Nico shortly after he was put down.
He died with his mouth open where he was hooked up to oxygen. The orange blanket the vet had rapped him up in came home with me and I slept will it all night last night. Nico will be cremated privately according to his vet papers and he should come "back" home to us in 1-3 weeks. I don't know what they do with pets before its time to cremate them, I think I read somewhere that they're kept in a freezer or cooler room so they don't start to smell (I regret not asking). I just hope he is being treated respectfully as I write this. Anyways, they were nice enough to make me a paw print from his paw and let me take it home (it just needs to dry) and I got to keep some of his furs and a few whiskers. Which I greatly appreciated.
For Nico: 8/14/2008 to 7/14/2014.
It hurts to be the one
That had to make the choice
Your life rested in my hands
I had to be your voice
I hope you will forgive me
I had to sever the tie
I knew you wouldn’t leave me
You would never say goodbye
Our bond will never be broken
I know this to be true
And when I leave this earth
I have you to look forward to
For now I can only tell you
That I miss you dearly my friend
I’m learning to smile through the days
But you know it’s only pretend
I still see you when I close my eyes
And feel you through and through
This empty place inside my heart
Can be filled by only you
They say memories are golden
well maybe that is true.
I never wanted memories,
I only wanted you.
A million times I needed you,
a million times I cried.
If love alone could have saved you
you never would have died.
In life I loved you dearly,
In death I love you still.
In my heart you hold a place
no one could ever fill.
If tears could build a stairway
and heartache make a lane,
I’d walk the path to heaven
and bring you back again.
Our family chain is broken,
and nothing seems the same.
But as we are called one by one,
the chain will link again.
Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there, I did NOT die...
Rest in peace my darling boy, mommy will ALWAYS love you.
Today we gather here for the celebrating of Life with Ragdolls. Congratulations to us, Life with Ragdolls is now 1 year old. I'm flabbergasted.Never thought I'd see (or should I say read) this post. Was going to quit in a few weeks of July in 2013, but sometimes you have to lose yourself to find out what you really want and that's exactly what I did. My biggest thanks must go to Tadpole (my 2004-2005 cat, but really he was born in 1989 or 1990), he was my inspiration for Life with Ragdolls, my idol, the greatest-love-of-my-life, my voice. For those of you that think or have thought that this blog is about Nico and Anya, or maybe even Star and Saphira, or maybe all four, its not. Its about Tadpole. He is my dead cat that belonged to a writer at heart. Who didn't get much life with him, but I've treasured them all and still do to this day. My life now belongs to Star, Saphira, and Nico and Anya, but my heart belongs to Tadpole and it always will. Don't get me wrong--I love and adore and treasure all of my babies both past and present, but I'llalways love that one--Tadpole. Same goes for all of them.
Anyways, thanks for following us, leaving comments, and of course reading LWR!!! (Life with Ragdolls).
Please pray for Nico. He is terribly ill today. I am in tears today, and he is doing awful. I would tell you what's wrong with him if I knew, I am crying right know and its too hard to write, comments will be closed on this post.
Finally after what feels like 6 years (oh, wait it was) we have finally found a food that helps with Star's corn allergies! I've tried a handful of different foods without corn, but none of them seemed to have worked well enough. I've tried 4Health cat food, but unfortunately it made them ill, I've tried Blue Buffalo; but after reading that their meats come from China--ew! And that their animals used for meat are killed in the cruelest way possible, I had another plan. If you think our meat industry is bad (which it is) then you should see China's, their animals are killed in the cruelest way they can do to them; which in no doubt makes me sad, and for those of you that are wondering I am not a vegetarian or a vegan, and I highly doubt I'll ever become one.
While Star's skin hasn't healed 100% yet; maybe about 45%. She has (in my opinion) has been less grumpy towards me, the people I live with, and my other cats. She also seems much more happier, which in turn makes me happier as well. I will never feed Star (or my other cats) corn again if possible. Corn does NOT belong in a cat's diet, and it is not good for them either; in fact we humans are the same. Corn is basically a useless grain. Its in almosteverything we eat (and drink).
I should probably mention the name of the food my cats are now eating, which is The Good Life Recipe. No corn, no soy, no by-products. Made in the USA. Not bad on the cost too, which is about $6-7 dollars a bag. I would like to home cook their own food some day too, but until then this works just as well. I recommend this food to all cat owners and their cats.
Today I have a review for you guys. This time we're reviewing 10 awesome cat toys for Star, Saphira, Nico, and Anya. There was originally 10 toys, but now there's only 9; I have no idea where the 10th went--my cats are masters at hiding stuff. Anyways, the toys are balls with feathers, my cats love balls; okay, that just totally sounded wrong, LOL. But they do, especially Anya...;-)
Sorry for the poor quality photos; it was cloudy out when I took them (Sunday).
As said above, my cats love feathers, especially Saphira and Nico.
All 9 toys. Like I said the 10th one is a POW (Prisoner Of War) lol.
These toys are made with wool and feathers and catnip. Hand made too. Cats love 'em. Even good ol' Star whom is 7 years old (will be 8 in August), likes them and goes crazy over them like she once did when she was a kitten almost 8 years ago. (Smiles).
*Good customer service
*Cats love them
*Keeps the catnip inside smelling fresh
* Though a few feathers have fallen out, or should I say chewed out, they are good toys, so there are no cons here.